In the Beginning
by OuToFmYmInDbAcKiN5MiNuTeS
Summary: Before they were dads, they were four guys trying to find their way in life. Follow their journey of the early years of their lives as new parents and newlyweds. Prequel to We Are saga.
1. Year One

**In the Beginning**

 **Ok so this is the a prequel to me We Are saga. You don't have to read those fics, (Landslide, Aftermath, We Are, and Happy Mistakes) to read this. Though this might make you want to read those. This will be roughly five chapters, depending on what you guys want to see.**

 **Chapter 1: Year One**

James smiled as he followed Kendall through the crowds of reporters. He had just left the hospital after his five month ultrasound. He had the picture of his baby in his hands and he was keeping it hidden from prying eyes. This wasn't for them to see. It was for him and Kendall, and anyone they chose to tell.

He felt a hand on his back. James glanced over to Kendall who had slowed down a bit. They reached the car and Kendall smiled and quickly opened the door for him. James smiled and thanked the blonde. Kendall just grinned at his boyfriend. They were both in a good mood. Nothing could bring them down, even the people following them.

Once they were on the road James gave a small sigh of relief. He was glad to be away from all the reporters for the moment. Kendall reached over and grabbed James' hand as he drove.

"How you feeling?" Kendall asked breaking the silence.

"Excited, we're having a boy Kendall," James said excitedly. He held the ultrasound picture out to look at it. It was amazing that a small human being was growing inside of him.

"Yeah, so how about Kendall?" Kendall asked with a smirk.

"That's what people expect, I really like the name Jacob," James said.

"Jacob Kendall?" Kendall asked.

"I was thinking more like Jacob Elijah," James said slowly.

"You've been talking to your dad again," Kendall chuckled.

"It just sounds so cute doesn't it?" James asked.

"Maybe," Kendall replied with a small smile.

"You smiled I won!" James declared. Kendall chuckled and shook his head. James was a bit ridiculous at times.

The two arrived at the Palm Woods and headed inside. They saw Logan and Camille talking. Ever since Camille had announced her pregnancy as well, the two had been talking an awful lot. It was no secret that the baby might be Logan's. They hadn't confirmed it, but everyone knew, even Carlos.

"Hey guys," Logan said once he spotted them. He and Camille made their way over to the two.

"So is my little princess going to have a little girl or boy to play with?" Camille asked.

"Not here," James said pointing up towards the apartment. "Where's Carlos?"

"Upstairs playing video games I think," Logan replied.

"Great, let's go," James said.

"You too Camille," Kendall added. She smiled and they all headed up to 2J.

They entered the apartment. Carlos was indeed playing video games. He looked up at the four and paused his game. He grinned as he ran over.

"So Carlos or Carla," Carlos asked holding his hand out for the ultrasound picture.

"Neither," James said, "it's Jacob." He said holding out the picture.

Camille snatched it first. She awed at the picture before letting the other two see. "Aw, Kendall he's got your wavy lines!" she teased causing the two to laugh at her.

"These two are gonna be the bestest friends ever," James said quickly.

"Hopefully," Camille said with a smile.

"So have you and Steve picked out any names," James asked curiously.

"Well Steve was hoping for a boy and he's got his heart set on Damien. I however like the name Sophia after my mom," Camille said.

"That's so cute," James cooed.

"Steve and I are also thinking of moving. He wants to go to school and he's applying to UCLA," Camille said.

"Good for him, what does he want to do?" Logan asked.

"Pre-law," Camille replied.

"He wants to be a lawyer?" Carlos asked.

"Yeah, he's wants to set a good example for our daughter. He's got everything planned out, and doesn't want me to worry about anything. He's got it all under control," Camille explained.

"Good for him, I've been thinking of applying to school too. I still want to be a doctor," Logan said thoughtfully.

"Not bailing on us are you? Just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean that Big Time Rush is over," James said.

"No, but I want to go back to school and maybe we could take a small break after Jacob is born. I mean you and Kendall aren't going to want to leave his side," Logan said logically. "I could take some classes and get my general ed classes out of the way."

"Yeah me too, I want to take some classes," Kendall said quickly.

"What? Does this mean you want the job?" James asked.

"What job?" Logan and Carlos asked in unison.

"Well Gustavo and I have been talking. He thinks I would make a good producer. He thinks I have a knack for it. It's a thought and I haven't made my final decision yet," Kendall said looking to James. "It's an option."

"Oh please it's all you've been talking about," James said.

"It's news to us," Carlos said quickly.

"I didn't want to say anything at first. I just need to figure some things out. I don't want to just leave you guys hanging," Kendall said quickly.

"It's fine Kendall, we know we can't be a band forever," Logan said.

"He's right," Camille said making herself known to the guys once more. "Most boy bands would have thrown in the towel by now. You guys have lasted longer than most people expected and that's a feat in itself. I mean come on you're not Backstreet. Those guys will be touring until their like eighty."

"I thought they already were," Kendall replied.

"Thanks Camille," Logan said looking to the curly haired girl. She just smiled in return.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall sighed as he followed James through the store. Jennifer had talked the two into baby shopping with her. She said she would be able to help them find everything they needed. Kendall didn't understand why they needed a million onsies and the most expensive crib that they could find. It didn't make sense to him.

"Oh my god, look at these," Katie said grabbing a pair of booties. James and Jennifer awed at them.

"No," Kendall said shaking his head, "unless you are buying them yourself," he told his sister.

"Boo, don't be such a party pooper," Katie said making a face at her older brother.

"Excuse me? Do you not see what we are getting already? I don't think we even need half of the stuff here," Kendall said pointing to the cart that the three had filled.

The three looked to the cart and then to Kendall, with sheepish smiles. James walked over to Kendall.

"Ok maybe it is a bit much, but don't you want to be prepared," James asked, "kids are a big responsibility and they spit up and poop a lot."

"Yeah, you'll be changing him so often," Jennifer said nodding her head.

"I know that, but I don't think we need three of the same thing, I don't care if its different sizes either," Kendall said.

"Maybe you're right," James said.

"We did get carried away," Katie said looking to some of the stuff.

"Can we just worry about necessities right now? Like diapers, bottle, and other care products," Kendall asked.

"Deal," James said, "can we get a few of these though?"

"A couple," Kendall replied. James smiled and hugged the blonde. Jennifer and Katie started to sort through everything with James. Kendall felt a little better about this shopping trip.

-In the Beginning-

Carlos bounced as he followed James into Rocque Records. They were going to meet with Gustavo and Kelly today. They were going to update them on the baby, and maybe talk about the future of the band.

"So are you excited?" Carlos asked.

"A little, I still can't believe that there's a little life growing inside me," James admitted.

"So where's Logan? I know Kendall got roped into a family thing," James asked.

"I don't know, he said he had something to do," Carlos shrugged.

"He's been acting a bit odd lately hasn't he," James said.

"Yeah, he's just thinking about the future and what he wants to do after the band. I mean he still wants to be a doctor," Carlos said.

"Well he's got the brains for it," James commented.

"Then you wanna be a model and Kendall's gonna be a producer," Carlos continued.

"Yeah, are you ok?" James asked slowly.

"I don't know what I wanna do with my life James," Carlos admitted. "I'm a mediocre singing at best. You and Kendall are the ones that carry us mostly. We all followed you here."

"Yeah, but you've got time to figure things out Carlos. We're still young," James said.

"What if I don't?" Carlos asked in a small voice.

"You will, it just takes time. I mean look at me I'm six months pregnant. Being a model is a long way away for me. I'm gonna have work super hard to get back into shape and then pray to God that I don't get stretch marks. I've been lucky so far," James explained.

"Yeah, I guess, it's still a scary thought," Carlos mumbled.

"You know what's a scary thought?" James asked. He paused making sure he had Carlos's attention. "In about three months time I will be a father and I will have this tiny baby that will depend on me for its every need, only it can't tell me what it needs so I have to figure it out on my own."

Carlos was speechless. James sighed. "I'm terrified Los, I don't know what to do. Besides my dream of becoming a model may never come true. It was pure dumb luck the Gustavo was in Minnesota that day, and even luckier that he wanted to sign Kendall so bad."

"I get, we've all got fears and doubt over the future," Carlos said quickly.

"You'll help me and Kendall with this kid right?" James asked.

"Of course, I'll be awesome uncle Carlos," Carlos said with a smile. "And Logan will be the one to keep the kid safe."

"Thanks," James chuckled.

-In the Beginning-

James groaned as he shifted in his seat. It seemed the further he got in his pregnancy, the more uncomfortable he became. Everything was uncomfortable too, not just sitting.

"You ok?" Kendall asked his boyfriend.

"I am eight months pregnant. I look like a whale and this kid won't stop moving, do I look ok to you?" James asked.

"I'm sorry, want me to rub your feet?" Kendall asked moving to sit on the ottoman in front of James. He grabbed his foot.

"Well...ok," James said smiling. Even though he was uncomfortable and crabby, he couldn't stay mad at the blonde.

"So, I've been talking with Gustavo and he agrees that we should take some time off once the baby is born," Kendall said.

"And by agree you mean your mom and Kelly forced him too," James asked knowingly.

"Something like that," Kendall chuckled. He continued to run James' feet.

"So my mom said she's gonna be here for three weeks. One before my due date and two after. She's excited to meet her grandson. My dad and wife number two will be here closer to my due date," James said.

"Great," Kendall said enthusiastically.

"You're a horrible faker," James said.

"I don't mind you're parents. It's just your mom is getting on my nerves with all this talk about us moving to Minnesota," Kendall sighed.

"I know, and we're not going to. We've made a name for ourselves and she's gotta respect that," James said

"She won't. She just wants you to come home still. She misses you," Kendall said.

"I know, but I'm an adult now. Besides it's not like we will never see her. We go home for most holidays, or she comes out here," James said.

"I know, but she's pushy and almost no one says no to Brooke Diamond. You know that," Kendall said quickly.

"I do," James said quickly.

"Good, because you know I can't. She's scary," Kendall said. James just laughed at that.

"I don't get why everybody say that. She's not that scary," James sighed.

"To you she's not too scary, she's your mom and she babies you," Kendall shot back.

"She does not," James said quickly.

"Oh please you are her only child. She takes any chance she get to buy stuff for you or come visits you," Kendall said, "She will do anything for you and you don't even need to ask."

"Ok maybe a little bit, but like you said I'm her only child," James said.

-In the Beginning-

Carlos wandered out to the pool. He was looking for Logan, but he could not find him. Logan had been acting so strange lately. Ever since Camille announced her pregnancy, he had become a bit jumpy. Carlos knew why too.

There was a chance that, the baby might be his. Logan would never say it out loud though. He was probably terrified. Carlos wasn't mad though. He knew Logan and Camille had and on-again off-again type relationship. When Logan finally ended it for good Carlos had been so happy. It took Logan a couple weeks to finally muster up the courage to ask him out, with a little help from Kendall.

A few weeks after that Camille announced that she was pregnant. She was a few weeks further along than James. That had been a red flag for all the guys, but she assured them that Steve was the father, not that any of them bought it.

Carlos sighed as he looked around the pool. He spotted the Jennifer's sitting together, minus one. That was odd. They were never apart unless one of them was shooting a movie or something.

Carlos made his way over to the pair. He greeted them with a smile. They both greeted Carlos.

"Where's the other Jennifer?" Carlos asked.

"She's off with her new "boyfriend," if you can even call him that," Curly haired Jennifer said.

"Yeah, he's some business man that swept her off her feet," blonde Jennifer said.

"Oh, you don't sound happy, shouldn't you be happy that your friend is happy?" Carlos asked confused.

"We tried, but he's scum. He's a low life," blonde Jennifer said shaking her head.

"She'll be knocked up and alone within a year, trust me," curly haired Jennifer said.

"Wow a bit harsh?" Carlos said.

"If you met him you'd understand. He's older and he's already got a kid," blonde Jennifer said.

"He just seems shady," curly haired Jennifer added.

"Well let's hope she's smart enough to realize it before things get out of hand," Carlos said.

"So enough about us, we heard about James, so boy or girl," blonde Jennifer asked.

"Boy, Jacob," Carlos said causing both girls to aw.

"So does that make you like an uncle then?" Curly haired Jennifer asked.

"Yeah, I'm gonna be the fun uncle too. Logan can kind of be a stick in the mud sometimes. It's ok though, I'm fun enough for the both of us," Carlos said quickly.

"You are adorable," blonde Jennifer cooed.

"You gonna have a kid?" Curly haired Jennifer asked.

"Eventually," Carlos shrugged. "I mean Logan and I haven't been together that long. I would like to be married before I have a kid."

"Me too," curly haired Jennifer agreed.

"I don't want kids. They're loud and messy. They just complicate things," Blonde Jennifer said shaking her head.

-In the Beginning-

Logan sighed as he listened to Camille go on and on about the baby. She was so happy right now. She didn't notice the uncomfortable silence between the two men she was with.

"Mille," Steve said getting her attention.

"Hm?"

"What exactly are we gonna do about our...um...current situation?" Logan asked.

"Look I honestly don't care. My Sophia is on her way. As far as I am concerned Steve is her father and he's gonna help me raise her right?" She asked looking to Steve.

"Of course Camille, I'd never leave you," Steve replied quickly with a smile.

"Yes but, I don't want this kids coming out and looking like me and people assuming I just left you with a kid. If I messed up I wanna take responsibility for my mistake," Logan said.

"After she's born we can do a paternity test on Steve. That way you're not involved and no one has to know it might be you. It'll be discreet and we don't even have to tell anyone," Camille said. "No matter the results, this kid is going to be loved."

"Ok what are we gonna do if, by chance I'm not the biological father? What will Carlos do? He will probably be mad that you didn't tell him sooner," Steve said.

"You let me deal with that. I'm sure he already suspects anyways. I know Kendall and James know," Logan sighed.

"We will cross that bridge when we get there. Lots of families are split and I would never keep her from you if she's your daughter Logan," Camille said.

"I don't know if I'm ready to be a parent though," Logan said.

"Is anyone ever really ready?" Camille asked.

"We don't even know for sure yet, let's just wait," Steve said.

"Yes let's not get ahead of ourselves," Camille agreed.

Logan nodded his head. He wanted to stop worrying, but part of him knew that there was a chance he could be the father to Camille's baby. Logan wasn't ready for that. He didn't want a kid right now. He had so many plans for the future. He wanted to go to school and become a doctor. Carlos wanted to start a career in Hollywood. They had so much they still wanted to do before they settled down.

-In the Beginning-

The guys all practically ran down the hallway. Steve had called and said Camille was in labor. They were all excited to meet the little bundle of joy. They reached the OB ward. They saw Steve standing by the nursery with a smile on his face.

"So where is she?" Carlos asked eagerly.

"He's right there," Steve said pouting to the only blue bundle in the nursery.

"He?" Logan asked.

"Yeah, he's a boy," Steve chuckled. His eyes never leaving the baby. "Camille's a little upset that all the dresses she bought were for nothing, but we're just glad he's healthy."

"So I take it you're not naming him Sophia?" James asked.

"No, it's Damien," Steve said

"Where's Camille? How's she doing?" Kendall asked.

"In her room resting. Giving birth takes a lot out of a person," Steve said. "I'm exhausted from just being there."

"That's it I'm done," James said quickly.

"It's a bit too late for that," Kendall chuckled. James just sighed and looked down at his stomach.

"This is all your fault," James said turning to glare at the blonde. "I used to have abs. Do you know how hard it's gonna be to get them back."

"I'm sorry," Kendall said simply.

"You make it so hard to be mad at you sometimes," James sighed.

"Love you too," Kendall replied.

The guys all looked around and saw Steve sitting in a chair. He had a small smile on his face.

"How's it feel to be a dad?" Kendall asked.

"Right now, it's still sinking in. It's hard to believe that he's finally here," Steve said. "It's still so surreal."

"Where is she?"

Steve sat up straighter. A woman, who looked almost exactly like Camille came running in. She spotted Steve and ran over.

"Where's my daughter and my granddaughter," she asked.

"Hi Sophie nice to see you too. Camille and resting, and your grandson is right here," Steve said jumping up and moving to the nursery window.

"Grandson?" Sophie asked.

"Yeah, turns out she was a he, so meet Damien," Steve said pointing to his son with a big smile.

"Oh he's so cute," Sophie said. "I already love him more than anything in the world."

"Me too," Steve replied.

-In the Beginning-

Logan was sitting with Camille and Damien. Steve was busy getting their new apartment ready. Logan wanted to visit Camille. He needed to talk to her.

"God he's adorable isn't he?" Camille asked looking down at her son.

"Yeah, he's cute," Logan agreed.

"I'm a little disappointed I didn't get my Sophie, but there is always next time," Camille said.

"You want another already?" Logan asked shocked.

"Not right away, I mean in a few years, but yeah I'd like at least two kids," Camille said.

"I don't know if I could handle a kid, at least right now," Logan admitted.

"Really? So you're hoping you're off the hook?" Camille asked.

"Am I?" Logan asked. He wanted to know. It was killing him not knowing if he was a dad or not.

Camille seemed to be stalling. Logan wasn't sure if it was a good sign or not. Then again, maybe she just wanted to wait for Steve.

The door opened and Steve walked into the room. He looked to Logan and Camille with a small smile.

"Sorry I'm late, I've been busy getting everything ready in the new apartment. We should be all set to move in tomorrow," Steve said smiling at Camille.

"It's ok, Logan and I were waiting for you," Camille said with a smile.

"So what's the word?" Steve asked.

"Saunders," Camille replied.

"Really?" Steve asked.

"Oh thank god," Logan breathed. "I mean...yeah."

"It's ok Logan, it's a weight off your shoulders," Camille giggled.

Logan nodded his head. She was right. It was a weight of his shoulders. Steve looked relieved too. Logan knew deep down that Steve wanted this kid to be his. He put on a smile most of the time and had Camille fooled that he was happy either way, but he wasn't.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall held James hand as another contraction hit. James had gone into labor the night before. It was slow going at first. The doctors wanted to keep him overnight, incase anything changed.

Now however the contractions were getting closer together. Kendall was here for James every step of the way, no matter how much it annoyed Brooke.

People were coming and going all day. Most of the family, Logan and Carlos included, were camped out in the waiting room. They were all awaited news. They would come and visit with the couple too.

Logan and Carlos were in the room at the moment. Brooke was beside her son as well. She hadn't left his side much. They were all waiting for James' doctor to check and see if James was ready to push.

"Why does this have to take so long!" James whined.

"I don't know Jamie, just remember, take deep breaths," Kendall said.

"You're not helping," James snapped.

"Sorry," Kendall apologized.

Eventually the doctor arrived. Carlos and Logan left. Kendall left with them telling James he was going to go let everybody know what was up.

Kendall made his way to the waiting room with his friends. The truth was, he was nervous. He was about to become a dad. It was a scary thought. He had seen what Steve and Camille were going through. They both claimed to be ok with it. Kendall hoped he would be too.

Everyone had a million questions. Kendall answers them the best he could, but he had to get back to James. Kendall left the waiting room and ran into Brooke.

"It's time," she said.

"Really?" Kendall asked shocked. Suddenly everything felt like it was moving fast.

"Yeah," Brooke said. She turned and left. Kendall followed her.

As they neared James room, Brooke stopped. Kendall almost ran into her. He gave her a confused look as she turned to him.

"Is something wrong?" Kendall asked.

"No, it's just I wanted to apologize to you for treating you the way I have been these last few months," Brooke said.

Kendall was shocked. Brooke never apologized to anyone. The only one she was ever kind to was James.

"It's ok," Kendall said slowly. Now wasn't really the time for this. James was waiting for them.

"No it's not, I was awful and it's because I don't want to see James grown up and not needing me anymore," Brooke said. "I used to be the only one who made him smile so bright the stars seemed dim. Now you do it too...and I'm loosing my baby."

"You're not loosing him," Kendall assured her.

"I am, he's becoming a man now, and with you by his side I'll know he's taken care of and has someone to support him and my grandson," Brooke said with a small smile. "I think you will make a great son in law one day."

Then she didn't a very un-Brooke like thing and hugged Kendall. He awkwardly hugged her back. This was a big step for them. Kendall had a little more respect for the older woman now.

The two quickly entered James room. There was his doctor and two nurses there already. Kendall smiled and joined James by his side and Brooke stood back a moment.

Kendall took James' hand in his. He smiled and gave him encouraging words as James said he couldn't do it. Kendall looked to Brooke for help. She smiled and walked over to James's other side.

"James, sweetie you can do this," Brooke said soothingly, in a way only a mother could. "Kendall and I are gonna be right here beside you."

"Ok," James said wide eyed. He was still scared, but at the same time he knew he could do it.

"Ok James on your next contraction I want you to start pushing," his doctor instructed. James just nodded his head. Brooke took his other hand.

Almost an hour later, Jacob Elijah Knight was born. He had dark hair and his eyes were dark brownish green. The doctor said his eyes might change color over the next few months it was nothing to be worried about.

Once Jacob was weighed and measured and cleaned up. They brought the back baby to James. James cradled him close with a big smile on his face despite how tired he was.

"Hi Jake," he said softly. He glanced up at Kendall for a moment. "He's so adorable."

"He looks just like you," Kendall replied as he sat on the edge of the bed next to James. He placed an arm round him and looked down at his son.

The two sat there in silence. This was it, they were officially parents now there was no going back. Jake was here to stay. They had to learn to take care of him.

"Aw, you guys look so adorable."

The pair looked up as Katie and Jennifer walked into the room, with Brooke behind them, Kendall smiled at them.

"Go ahead, I'm tired anyways," James said handing Jake over to Kendall.

Kendall pressed a kiss to James' forehead. "Get some rest. We will be here."

Kendall walked over to his mother and sister. Brooke stood back a bit. She had seen Jake already, it was Jennifer and Katie's turn to meet him.

"He's so tiny," Katie cooed.

"I know," Kendall said looking down at his son. It was still hard to believe that he was here.

"May I?" Jennifer asked. Kendall smiled and nodded his head. He carefully handed his son over to his mother.

"He's just so precious," Brooke said taking a step up to Jennifer. The pair started cooing over their grandson.

Kendall looked over to James. He saw that he had fallen asleep already. He had done enough. He deserved to rest.

Once Katie and Brooke held Jake they decided to leave. Jennifer said that Everyone else would be back in the morning to see the baby. Kendall nodded his head. He was a bit surprised that Carlos and Logan hadn't barged in yet.

As Kendall was getting Jake settled there was a knock at the door. Kendall turned around and came face to face with his friends.

"We were waiting until your moms were done," Logan said.

"How thoughtful," Kendall replied. He walked over to the pair and passed Jake over to Logan.

"Wow," Carlos said looking down at the baby.

"He looks just like James," Logan said.

"I know," Kendall said with a big smile.

"How are you feeling though?" Logan asked as Carlos managed to steal the baby from him.

"I think you're supposed to ask me that."

The guys all turned to James. He was looking at them sleepily.

"We didn't mean to wake you," Kendall said quickly.

"Sorry," Logan said.

"It's ok," James said sleepily.

"Ok we met Jake, we will get out of your hair. We will be back tomorrow," Logan said looking to Carlos.

"Yeah, I'm sure Kelly and Gustavo will stop by too," Carlos said quickly.

"Alright guys," Kendall said taking his son back. The guys said their goodbyes.

Soon Kendall and James were alone with Jake. Kendall walked over to James. He simply held his arms out to Kendall. Kendall smiled and handed Jake over once more.

"We made a cute baby," James said grinning as he looked up to Kendall. "I was just hoping he'd look more like you."

"There's always next time," Kendall winked.

"Not for a while. You are not touching me at all for like a year...or ten," James said quickly. Kendall laughed and shook his head.

"No one is ever gonna be good enough for you," James said looking down at his son.

"Dating already? The kid was just born," Kendall laughed.

"I know, but It's true. No one will ever be good enough for my boy," James said hugging the infant close.

"I agree, he's not gonna date until he's like thirty," Kendall said.

"Strict," James chuckled.

"Ok twenty five and not a day sooner," Kendall conceded.

"What are we gonna do?" James asked.

"Teach him the best we can and pray to god he listens to us. That's all we an do," Kendall sighed, "but for now let's enjoy the little stuff. Like I said he was just born. Let's cherish the time we have with him right now. Cause lord knows one day he won't want to be around us."

"Never! He will always want to be with us," James gasped.

"Sure thing James," Kendall replied.

"Let's not worry about that just yet. Right now lets just live in the moment," James said.

-In the Beginning-

James smiled at he looked down at his son. He was going home today. They had been in the hospital for three days now. James was ready to go home and start his life as a father.

Jake was anxious too. He just seemed to know something was going on. He was squirming in his car seat. He was wearing a tiny red polo and tiny jeans. James was pleased with the outfit. It looked so cute.

"This is it, once we leave here we will be on our own," Kendall said making himself known to James.

"I know," James said looking down to Jake. "I'm kind of scared."

"We got this," Kendall said walking up behind his boyfriend. He place his arms around him.

"Are you sure? Cause I don't think I know how to be a parent. What if we mess the kid up?" James asked.

"We won't," Kendall assured the brunette, hugging him a little tighter.

"How do you know?" James asked.

"Because he's got you and me for dads. This kid is gonna be awesome at sports and maybe even be a singer," Kendall replied.

"We can only hope," James said.

There was a knock at the door. It opened and Carlos and Logan entered the room.

"It's a mad house out there," Logan said.

"Crazy, they're all waiting for you guys," Carlos said walking over to Jake. "Especially you," he said in a baby voice.

"This should be fun," Kendall sighed.

"Don't worry, we go this we will keep the vultures at bay," Carlos said quickly.

"Yeah, besides we not taking a main exit. Your mom and sister are waiting in the parking garage with our car and your mom's car is out front," Logan said.

"I love you guys," Kendall chuckled.

"Your welcome," Carlos replied.

"Last time I texted Katie she said we were all clear," Logan added.

"Awesome, I don't want to deal with that mad house," James said.

A nurse entered with some discharge papers for James and Jake. Once they we're all filled out and returned, Kendall and James were ready to go.

"You ready dad?" James asked.

"As ready as I'll ever be, papa," Kendall replied with a grin. James smiled in return.

The next eighteen years, were going to be a challenge. James knew that being a parent wasn't going to be easy, but he knew with Kendall by his side, he could do it. They were as ready as they could be.

 **So there you go. A nice start to this little side fic. It's going to be roughly five chapters. Are Kendall and James ready to be dads? Can they handle a newborn? Are Steve and Camille able to handle a newborn as well? Will Carlos figure out what he wants to do with his life? Is Jennifer's new boyfriend bad news? Will Jake and Damien become best friends? I think we know the answer to that one already.**

 **As always more to come, and I will see you next time.**

 **Always**

 **OUTOFMYMIND**


	2. Year Two

**In the Beginning**

 **I would like to thank** _winterschild11, Charlie-Rose94 and annabellex2_ **for taking the time to review. Also sorry for the wait.**

 **Chapter 2: Year Two**

James yawned as he made his way down the hall to his bedroom, with a warm bottle in hand. The crying only got louder as he neared the room. James entered the room. Kendall was walking around rocking Jake gently as he waited for a bottle. He gave James a small smile when he saw him.

"Sorry, I took so long," James said handing the bottle over.

"It's ok," Kendall said as he gave Jake the bottle. Once Jake latched on, the crying instantly stopped.

"Can you believe it's been two months already," James asked.

"Only two months?" Kendall asked tiredly. "Feels like it's been forever. This kid never lets us sleep," he added.

"He's a baby Kendall, he's got needs and we are his dad's. We gotta take care of him," James said.

"I know that, but I haven't gotten more than two hours of sleep at a time in the last week. I feel like I'm gonna collapse at any moment," Kendall said.

James sat down on the bed next to Kendall. He watched as Kendall fed Jake. Once Jake finished Kendall set about burping their baby.

Over the last two months a lot had changed. They realized just how big a responsibility a baby was. They couldn't just let him cry, they had to figure out what he needed. It could be anything from being hungry, to a dirty diaper, to having itchy clothes. It was a big job they had had to work around the clock. They were both sleep deprived. They both needed a break. James got an idea.

"Give him to me," James said holding his arms out. Kendall looked to the brunette confused. "You can lay down and I'll take care of him for a bit." He offered.

"Are you sure? I don't want to leave you on your own," Kendall started.

"It's fine Kendall, we will be in the living room and if I need you, you're right here," James assured his boyfriend. "We'll be fine for a few hours, right Jake?" He asked looking down at the infant.

"Ok, if you need anything-" Kendall started.

"I'll need some sleep later, you can take over then," James said with a smile. Kendall nodded his head smiling as well.

James left the bedroom and Kendall. It was the first time he was really alone with Jake. Normally there was always someone there, whether is be Kendall, Jennifer, or his mother. James had never fully been alone with his son.

-In the Beginning-

Logan made his way up to the apartment with Carlos. They had gone out to get some peace and quiet. They loved Jake, but all he did was cry. They could only take so much. Logan felt bad for bailing on Kendall and James though. They had to have it worse that he and Carlos did. Maybe there was something they could do.

"Maybe we could watch the kid for a few hours and let Kendall and James get some sleep," Logan suggested.

"Yeah, I mean we did just kind of bail on them," Carlos said slowly.

"It'll be fine, I mean they will be right there if we need them. It can't be that hard to watch a kid for two hours when all he does it eat, sleep, and poop," Logan said.

"Yeah, I guess, it's part of being an uncle isn't it," Carlos asked.

"Yeah, we get all the fun stuff and can give them back when they are fussy," Logan chuckled.

"But Jake's only like two months old, what if we hurt him or something?" Carlos asked.

"We won't, it's only a couple hours, don't you think Kendall and James deserve it. They have been going nonstop since Jake was born, they need a break," Logan reasoned.

"I guess," Carlos said. The two arrived at the apartment.

Logan dug his keys from his pocket and unlocked the door. They entered the apartment. They saw Kendall and James sitting on the floor next to Jake, who was laying on his tummy.

"Oh hey guys," Kendall said looking to them with a smile.

"Hey," James said looking up as well.

"You two seem awful pleasant," Logan said looking to Carlos confused. When they had left Kendall and James had been cranky and hollering at them. They seemed to definitely be in a better mood.

"Sorry about earlier, but when you're going on no sleep for weeks it's hard to stay happy," Kendall said.

"It's ok, you guys are under a lot of stress," Logan shrugged.

"But look at Jake, he's getting so big and he can lift his head already," James said with a smile.

The guys looked down at Jake. He was squirming and lifting his head every now and then. They all awed at him. He was so adorable when he wasn't crying.

"So Los and I were thinking, maybe sometime we could watch Jake for you, while you guys go get some sleep or something," Logan said crossing the room and sitting down next to Jake.

"Ok, how about tomorrow morning? We all just woke up from a nap so we're fine now, but I know he's gonna keep us up all night," Kendall said looking down at his son.

"Deal," Logan replied.

"Don't forget, Camille wants us to come over tomorrow afternoon," James said quickly.

"I know," Kendall said looking to his boyfriend. "Which is why we will sleep in the morning and be fully rested when we go see them."

"Smart," Logan chuckled.

"Please, I'm full of smart ideas," Kendall said cockily.

"Careful Kendall, your ego is showing," James joked. Kendall just stuck his tongue out at the brunette.

-In the Beginning-

Camille moved about her apartment cleaning. Kendall James would be stopping in with Jake this afternoon. She had to make sure the place looked decent. She glanced over to her sleeping baby with a smile.

"You're only a few months old and this place is a mess, I wonder what it will look like when you're old enough to move around?" She said quietly.

"What was that?"

Camille looked up as Steve emerged from their bedroom. He had a messenger bag slung over his shoulder and his laptop bag on the other. He had been taking classes at UCLA for a few months now, and everything was going good.

"Oh nothing, just talking to myself," Camille said smiling as she walked over to him. She gave him a peck on the lips.

"What's with all the cleaning?" Steve asked looking around.

"Kendall and James are coming over, I don't want them to think I'm a total slob just because I have a baby that keeps me up all hours of the night," Camille said.

"This place is fine, besides I'm sure their apartment is no better," Steve replied. Camille smiled at that. "You do a great job already. A little clutter never hurt anyone."

"You are too good for me," Camille sighed with a smile.

"No, you are too great for me and I will do whatever is takes to be good enough for you," Steve replied as he walked over to her. He stopped in front of her.

"If you say so," Camille replied.

"I know so, you are amazing Camille. You're an amazing girlfriend, and an amazing mother to our son. I am so happy that you chose me. I thank god everyday for you, because you are a blessing and force me to be a better man," Steve said.

"You do that for me too," Camille replied. Steve chuckled and kissed her on the forehead. "You better get going, otherwise you'll be late for class," Camille said checking the time.

"I guess," Steve sighed.

Camille giggled at that. She knew he hated leaving her alone with Damien, but it had to be done. He couldn't be a lawyer without an education first. Well, he could, but no one would take him seriously.

"Bye Steve, Damien and I will be here when you get back," Camille said walking him to the door. She gave him a peck on the cheek.

Steve grabbed his car keys from the hook by the door. He said his goodbyes once more and gave Camille one last kiss, before he was gone.

Once she was alone, Camille returned to the infant across the room. He was wide awake and chewing on his fingers. He was three months old already, and getting stronger as time went on. He was figuring things out.

-In the Beginning-

Logan sat back as he watched Carlos fuss over Jake. They were watching him for the morning, by themselves. Kendall and James were in the next room sleeping, but Logan didn't want to disturb them.

"Look uncle Logie," Carlos declared once he finished changing the baby.

Logan looked up and smiled. Jake was decked out in the batman gear that Logan and Carlos had bought for him.

"Told you he'd look cute in them," Carlos said with a smile.

"Yeah, now don't let Kendall see," Logan chuckled. He knew Kendall would have a fit if he saw Jake in batman clothes. Kendall loved Spider-Man and was pushing that onto Jake.

Carlos walked over to the couch with Jake a sat down. He smiled as he looked at the baby. "See this isn't so hard."

"I wasn't the one freaking out Los," Logan chuckled. Carlos looked up at Logan with a small smile.

"I know, but he's so tiny, I just don't wanna hurt him or do something wrong," Carlos said quickly.

"I know, but he eat, sleeps, and poops. That's about it, oh and he cries too," Logan said quickly.

"Right, but he's been good for us so far," Carlos said looking down at Jake. "You're just cutest baby ever aren't you?" He asked in baby talk.

Logan sat back with a smile. Carlos was a natural with Jake. He seemed to know just what to do when Jake cried. It almost made Logan want one of his own, but he wasn't ready for that. He was still recovering from the shock of almost being a dad to Damien.

"When we have a baby they will be even cuter," Carlos commented.

"You think so?" Logan asked arching a brow at his boyfriend.

"Well yeah, they will have us for dads and we are awesome. You're smokin hot and I'm adorable, so therefore any kids we have would be super cute," Carlos replied with a smile.

Logan laughed at that. Carlos always knew how to make him laugh and smile. He leaned over and pecked the Latino on the cheek.

"Sure thing Los, but we've got time let's not rush it," he said.

"I know, I'm just saying is all," Carlos said his cheeks turning red.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall smiled as he listened to Camille and James talk. They were each holding each other's babies. James had Damien, and Camille was holding Jake. They were both talking about the lack of sleep and how worth it, it was.

"How do you guys look so well rested? I feel like I haven't slept in a month," Camille said.

Kendall laughed at that, "we had Logan and Carlos watch Jake this morning."

"Smart, I might have to ask Steve's sister to see if she wants to watch Damien for a few hours," Camille said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, it's was nice to get some sleep this morning," James said smiling.

"Ok now you're just showing off," Camille chuckled.

"Maybe, but you should try it sometime," James replied.

The three sat together a bit longer talking about the babies. It was nice to just relax and not have to worry about somewhere to be or what to do.

"It's so weird that you're not at the Palm Woods anymore," Kendall commented.

"I know, it's strange being here where I don't have friends," Camille agreed.

"Kendall and I have been thinking about moving out too," James admitted.

"Really?" Camille asked shocked.

"Yeah, the apartment is getting a bit crowded, and well we can't live there forever," Kendall said nodding his head.

"When did we become grown ups?" Camille asked making a face.

"I'd say around the time these two came into our lives," James said looking at the babies.

"Yeah," Camille said looking to Damien. Her smile grew as she watched him.

-In the Beginning-

James entered the apartment with his arms full of grocery bags. He didn't hear a sound, meaning Jake was content for the moment. He hoped it stayed that way. He looked around for his blonde boyfriend. He didn't seem him or their son anywhere.

James set the bags aside for the moment. He headed to his shared room with Kendall. He didn't find them there. James frowned. Kendall would've texted him if he had taken Jake out. They rarely took Jake out as it was. There were too many people trying to take his picture to sell it to the tabloids.

He made his way back out to the living room. He heard a noise he hadn't heard before. It was a soft snore, that he would recognize anywhere. He smiled as he walked around the big orange couch. Kendall was sleeping with Jake laying on his chest. He had a hand on Jake's back holding him in place. He smiled at the pair. He almost didn't want to disturb them. James slipped his phone out and took a picture, it was a moment he didn't want to forget. He pocketed his phone, and carefully picked his son up. Kendall sensed the movement. He looked up groggily at James.

"Wazzgoinon?"

"Shh," James said as he gently rocked Jake to keep him sleeping. "You fell asleep," he told his boyfriend.

"Oh, sorry," Kendall mumbled as he sat up.

"Kendall, go to bed, I got this," James said.

"No I'm fine," Kendall said standing up and stretching. "I feel refreshed really. Ok good to go," he said with a smile.

"Ok, then help me put stuff away," James said walking over to the playpen, he set Jake down.

Once everything was put away, the two returned to their son, who was wide awake. James smiled as he watched Kendall play with Jake. Jake was smiling and having a great time. Then it happened.

"Did you hear that?" Kendall asked shocked.

"He laughed," James said tears nearly coming to his eyes. That was the first time Jake had done that.

"I know," Kendall said smiling. He returned his attention to Jake, intent on making his son laugh some more.

-In the Beginning-

Carlos felt a ache as he watched Kendall and James play with Jake. It was Christmas and Jake had gotten lots of toys and new clothes. Lots of clothes. Carlos didn't understand how the kid went through so my clothes.

Carlos couldn't help but feel a longing for a kid. He saw Kendall and James, and Camille and Steve. They were all so happy. Carlos wanted that, but he was scared to mention it to Logan. They hadn't been dating that long. Logan had always told the guys that he didn't want kids until after he was married. There was no way Logan would want kids right now.

"You ok?"

Carlos turned to look at his boyfriend. He plastered a smile on his face. "Better now that you're here," he replied smoothly.

"Smooth," Logan chuckled.

"I know, it's why you love me," Carlos replied batting his eyelashes. Logan chuckled at that.

"Yeah, I do," he replied.

Carlos smiled brightly at that. Logan seemed satisfied with his answer. He started talking to Kendall and James. He mentioned the New Years party that Gustavo insisted that they attend. Jennifer had offered to watch Jake for them.

"I don't know what angle Gustavo it trying to play," Kendall said as Katie took Jake away from him.

"Yeah, he never wants us at his parties," James added his eyes on Katie as she and Jennifer fussed over Jake.

"Maybe he's just changed his mind. I mean we haven't been in the studio much and he probably misses us," Carlos reasoned.

"Right," Kendall said trying to stifle a laugh. "He's probably glad we're not causing mayhem at the studio."

"Come on, he's family at this point and while he might've liked it at first, I'm sure he misses you two," Carlos said.

"I gotta agree, it's not the same with you two gone," Logan piped in.

"You guys are probably right," Kendall said smirking, "we are pretty awesome."

"You're ridiculous," James said shaking his head at his boyfriend.

"Are we going then?" Logan asked.

"Of course," Kendall said quickly, "we can't let Gustavo down."

"Yeah, Kelly's been bugging us and asking when you're coming back. I think three months is enough time," James said looking over at his son once more.

"You can't even stop looking at him, how are you gonna leave him for eight hours?" Kendall asked grabbing James' attention. James turned back to look at him.

"I have no clue," James admitted.

"You two are going back to work after the new year," Jennifer said having been listening to them. "I'll watch Jake during the day. You have nothing to worry about."

"Thanks mom, I trust you," Kendall said looking to James.

"I trust you too, it's just...the thought of leaving Jake makes me sad," James said honestly.

"I know it's hard, but you gotta do it sooner or later," Jennifer chuckled at him.

James smiled and nodded his head. That didn't make him feel any better about leaving Jake.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall laughed as he led James along. They had ditched Gustavo's party. They had managed to get their hands on some booze. The pair was already tipsy. Kendall had decided he wanted some privacy. There were too many people around. He found an open door and led James in. They were in one of the recording studios.

"Kendall, you're going to get us in trouble," James said.

"Relax babe, it's only eleven and everyone else is too drunk to notice that we're gone," Kendall said quickly. He opened the bottle and took a swig. He made a face and passed it to the brunette. James took a drink.

"You're insane, you know that right," James asked.

"I know, but you love me anyways. Besides my mom already expects it. She knows what we do, she knows we don't go overboard and trusts us," Kendall said as he walked along the small room. He glanced to the couch in the back.

"Or she pretends she doesn't know so she can stay sane," James replied.

"That too," Kendall said turning to face his boyfriend. He walked up to the taller male. He took the bottle from him and set it aside. "God you're so sexy," he said leaning in and capturing James' lips in a kiss.

James moaned into the kiss. It had been so long since they had had any alone time. Lately all they had time for was Jake and his needs. Right now they had a moment to themselves.

Kendall directed James to the couch. He pushed the brunette down onto the couch. His hands started to explore the taller male's body. His hands found their way up James' shirt.

"God Jamie," Kendall said as he trailed kisses down the brunette's neck. "I want you so bad."

"What are you waiting for then?" James gasped leaning into Kendall's touch.

Clothes were flying across the room. The two were naked in record time. Hands were caressing and lips were mashed together in filthy kisses. Tongues mashed together and teeth smashed. Neither cared, as long as they got to be with the other.

Kendall's hands found James hole. He pressed a finger gently. James gasped and pressed down toward the finger. Kendall took that as a sign. He quickly lubed his fingers with spit. He looked up at James who was red in the face and panting begging for more. Kendall pressed a kiss to his lips, as he slipped a finger in. James moaned at that. Soon another finger was added. Kendall stretched the brunette open.

"Oh, just fuck me already," James demanded. Kendall chuckled and jumped up. He retrieved his wallet from his pants and pulled a condom out.

"I came prepared," Kendall winked. James pulled Kendall down on top of him.

"Hurry up, it's almost midnight," James snapped.

Kendall chuckled, but did as he was told. He slipped the condom on and moved to hover over his boyfriend once more. James pulled him down into a sloppy kiss. Kendall slipped into his boyfriend with a groan. James gasped and threw his head back.

Kendall quickly started to thrust into his boyfriend. James gasped and moaned. Kendall was hitting all the right spots. It was long before either of them hit their orgasm.

Kendall collapsed on top of James, his arms no longer being able to hold him up. Kendall just smiled at the man beneath him. James shoved him in response. Kendall stood and started to gather their clothes.

The two dressed quickly, between sharing kisses and grins. Once they were fully clothed, Kendall pulled his phone from his pocket. He grabbed James' hand.

"Come on, it's almost midnight," He said.

The pair made their way back to the dance studio, where the party was. They slipped in trying go unnoticed. Everyone was drunk and not paying them any mind. Nobody, except Logan and Carlos, who were grinning at their friends. Kendall knew they knew what had happened. Right now, he didn't care.

Suddenly everyone was shouting and pointing to the TV. The countdown has started. Kendall pulled James close as they counted down together. As they hit the end of the countdown, Kendall pulled James into a kiss.

"Happy New Year, Jamie," Kendall whispered. James smiled and returned the sentiment. They stood there cheering in the new year with everyone else.

-In the Beginning-

Logan yawned as he listened to Gustavo drone on about setting up a quick spring tour. He wanted them back in the spotlight. Now that Kendall and James were back to work, their third album was coming along nicely. Gustavo was trying to sell the guys on a tour. The only one not thrilled at the idea, was James.

"So you boys up for it?" Kelly asked looking to the four.

"I don't know," James stared.

"Will you stop that, we are so ready for this. My mom can watch Jake. He won't even remember," Kendall said nudging the brunette lightly.

"We will be ready," Carlos promised.

"You might, I'm still trying to lose all this baby weight," James snapped glaring at Carlos.

"Someone's moody," Carlos commented.

"Hello, I just had a baby, I'm practically a whale still. I can't seem to lose any weight, not matter how hard I try," James said gesturing to his body.

"Calm down," Kendall said reaching over and placing a hand on James' shoulder. "We knew this was coming, I mean do you really want to put your career on hold? Yes, we have a baby, but we can still do this. Besides, dancing it a great workout, and you'll lose all that baby weight in not time. Not that you need to because you're gorgeous already," he said.

"I hate that you do that," James grumbled.

"He's in," Kendall said turning to face the others with a smile.

"Ok, just a quick tour," James agreed.

"Of course, just a six week tour," Gustavo said nodding his head.

"Great, so we've been working it out, we've got a few shows already on the east coast and a few here, I figure we start in New York, and work our way west," Kelly said jumping into planning mode.

"Leave it to us, just show up to rehearsals," Gustavo said sharply.

"Gladly, is that all for today?" James asked.

"Excuse him, his manners seem to have been forgotten," Kendall said, "when do we start?"

"Tomorrow, you guys are done for the day," Kelly said giving them a smile. The guys all jumped up ready to bolt.

"Kendall, a word," Gustavo asked.

Kendall turned and looked to Gustavo. He nodded his head and shooed the others away. Kelly left as well. Once they were alone, Kendall looked up to the large man.

"Have you thought about what I've said," Gustavo said.

"I've given it a lot of thought," Kendall admitted. He took a seat at the table once more. "I'm not sure what I want to do right now. I always told myself I'd never raise a kid in the spotlight, it's a horrible place, but I don't want to leave."

"It's oddly addicting isn't it," Gustavo asked.

"Yeah," he agreed.

"Look I'm not forcing you to do this, but I know talent when I see it," Gustavo said, "I was right about you wasn't I?"

"Yes you were. I just...I know James and I aren't leaving L.A. He made that clear, he's got his own plans. I think after BTR is done, yeah it's a viable career move for me," Kendall said nodding his head.

"Good, I expect great things from you, Dog," Gustavo said smiling proudly.

"No pressure though," Kendall joked.

"None, you are amazing Kendall, you have talent and you don't even have to try," Gustavo said.

"You're confidence in me is reassuring," Kendall replied.

"Have you ever let me down?" Gustavo asked.

"No," Kendall replied with a smile. "I better get going, the guys are probably waiting for me." Gustavo nodded his head.

Kendall left the room. He couldn't believe how much confidence that Gustavo had in him. It was nice to know that he believed in him, but could Kendall do it? He was scared of letting the man down. He hadn't yet, but there was always a first for everything.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall sighed as he sank into the couch of the tour bus. It was fun being back on the road. They were kicking off their tour in New York City. Gustavo and Kelly had gone all out for this. Most of their shows were sold out. The guys were pumped. However, Kendall did miss Jake. They had only been gone a few days, but he missed him. James was worse than him. He was constantly calling Jennifer to check up on Jake. Kendall looked over at James as he finished his hundredth call to Jennifer.

"You're lucky my mom is kind and understanding," Kendall told him.

"I know, I just worry," James sighed as he sank down beside the blonde.

Logan and Carlos quickly ran into the room. Carlos had his laptop. They were both grinning.

"Who's up for a netflix binge? We've got a long ride ahead of us," Carlos asked.

"Yes please, what's on the list?" Kendall asked.

"Well there's Arrow, or Flash," Carlos said sitting down and opening his laptop.

"Or Supergirl," Logan said.

While the guys argued over what to watch Kendall decided to make some snacks. He dug around the cupboards. He decided on popcorn, and Carlos' various snack cakes he had stashed. Once a show was picked, they all settled in for the the long ride ahead of them.

Half way through the ride James got sick. He was constantly running to the bathroom. Kendall spent most of his time doting over him.

"I hate this, I never used to get car sick," James whined from his bunk.

"It's ok James, just get some rest," Kendall said patting his back.

"Yeah, maybe it'll help," James replied. He made his way to his bunk.

Kendall headed back out to the front of the bus where Logan and Carlos were still glued to the laptop.

"Is James ok?" Logan asked not taking his eyes off the screen.

"Yeah, he's just a little motion sick, I guess," Kendall replied sitting down next to the pair.

"James doesn't get motion sick Kendall," Logan said turning a pointed glare at the blonde.

"Shut up," Kendall said glaring at the bookworm.

"What?" Carlos asked confused.

"Nothing," Kendall said not taking his eyes off of Logan.

"Just saying, it's never happened before, well you know," Logan shrugged.

"Stop it," Kendall said glaring at the brunette.

-In the Beginning-

James tapped his foot as he waited impatiently for his doctor. He was nervous. Kendall was sitting silently across the room, with a faraway look in his eyes. He was probably trying to figure out how they had wound up here again.

A few weeks back, near the end of their tour James had been feeling off. He had managed to talk a crew member into buying him a pregnancy test. It tested positive. James had freaked out and Kensal found him crying. He had assured James that everything was going to be ok. They would deal with this and love this baby just as much as they loved Jake.

James cast his look down to the floor as he got lost in his thoughts. He couldn't believe that he had let this happen again. They had been so careful. They had agreed to wait to have another kid. James has insisted they use protection. He had been so vigilant, or he had thought he had been.

"Will you relax," Kendall asked. James looked up at the blonde. "Everything is gonna be ok. Pregnant or not."

"I know, but we agreed-" James started.

"Accident happen," Kendall shrugged. "Besides we already have Jake, so we know what we're in for, sort of." He added with a smile.

"I know, I just…I didn't think we would be back here so soon," James admitted.

"Me either, but I'm sorry I can't help myself with you," Kendall said with a wink. James blushed and looked away from him.

A knock at the door got their attention. Their doctor walked in with some papers in her hands. She smiled at the two.

"So what's the word?" Kendall asked.

"You are pregnant Mr. Diamond," she replied.

She started rambling on about what to do next. James kind of turned her out. He knew the drill, more appointments and vitamins to keep the baby healthy. He was focusing on her first words. He was pregnant again. Brooke was gonna kill him for sure.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall sighed as he sat down in front of Jake. James was taking a nap, and it was Kendall's job to feed Jake. They had started him on baby food. It hasn't been going too well.

"Ok Jake, man to man here, it's time for lunch. I need you to eat this food and not play with it," Kendall said holding up a jar of baby food. Jake just babbled away blowing spit bubbles at Kendall. "Also we are not going to make daddy wear the food."

"Lecturing him already?"

Kendall looked over to the orange couch where Logan was sitting. He was grinning at his friend.

"Yes, you saw what happened yesterday," Kendall said. Logan laughed and walked over to the two. "Wanna try? He's more interested in making you wear it, rather than eat it."

"Sure, uncle Logan to the rescue," Logan said taking Kendall's spot. He grabbed the food and spoon. "Alright Jake." Logan scooped some food onto the spoon. He smiled and opened his mouth. Jake copied him. Logan quickly gave Jake a spoonful of food.

"How did you do that?" Kendall asked his jaw dropped.

"Remember when we were freshman in highschool and my aunt Mitzi had Kya. I helped her with Kya all the time and she taught me a few tricks," Logan shrugged.

"I'm impressed," Kendall replied. "You'll make a good dad someday."

"Yeah, in a few years maybe, I've got Jake to spoil for now," Logan replied.

"With another on the way," Kendall said.

"James is ultrasound is soon. Are we hoping for a girl or boy?" Logan asked curiously.

"I kind of want a girl, but I'll love them either way. If it's a boy we'll just have to keep trying," Kendall joked.

"Want a big family there Ken?" Logan asked arching a brow at his friend.

"Oh yeah, I want at least four kids. I've always imagined myself having a big family," Kendall replied with a smile.

-In the Beginning-

Carlos watched as Kendall and James showed Jennifer and Katie their ultrasound picture. They had just found out they were having another boy. He was jealous, as much as he hated to admit it. Carlos wanted a baby. He had mentioned the idea to Logan in passing, but he shot it down with a laugh. He told Carlos they would eventually, but now wasn't a good time for them. Carlos had brushed it off as a joke, but he still longed for a baby of his own.

The second time Carlos brought it up, Logan had realized he was serious, but still shot the idea down. He said they weren't ready for a baby.

"You ok?"

Carlos turned his head as Logan's arms wrapped around him from behind.

"Yeah, just thinking," Carlos replied glancing over at his boyfriend.

"Carlos," Logan sighed.

"Not about that, don't worry," Carlos said with a smile.

"Come with me," Logan said letting go of the Latino.

Carlos spared once last glance to the happy family. He followed Logan to their bedroom. Once there, Logan turned to face him.

"Look Carlos," Logan started.

"It's not what you think," Carlos said shaking his head. "I get it, having a kid right now just isn't right for us. I'll wait."

"I'm sorry Carlos, I'm just not ready for a kid yet," Logan sighed looking away from the Latino. "I love you, I do, it's just…"

"You're not ready, I get it," Carlos replied placing a hand no the other's cheek and making him look at him. "We're young and we've got time. I get it that you're not ready."

"I'm sorry," Logan said turning away once more.

"You have nothing to be sorry about. I was being pushy. I can't help it, everyone has babies and I just got caught up in it all. I won't pressure you to do anything you don't want to do," Carlos said making Logan look at him once more. Logan smiled at the Latino.

"How did I get so lucky as to fall in love with someone like you," Logan asked.

"I'm the lucky one," Carlos replied.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall was sitting on the floor with Jake, while James got ready for bed. It was late and Jake was wide awake. Kendall thought it would be a good time to try crawling again. Jake was so close to doing it. He just needed the right motivation.

Kendall was sitting a little ways away from his son with Jake's favorite toy. It was a noise maker that captivates the baby for hours on end, much to Kendall's dismay.

"So I've been thinking," James called from within the bathroom.

"That's never a good sign," Kendall replied. He shook Jake's toy, trying to entice the baby.

"Shut up, I've been thinking about what I want to do with my life after Big Time Rush," James said.

Jake pushed himself up on wobbly arms and legs. Kendall smiled, and sighed as Jake fell down. He had been so close.

"You're gonna go solo aren't you?" Kendall asked.

"I dunno, I've always wanted to give modeling a try though," James said.

"You'll kill it. You're hot shit Jamie. I could totally see you being a model," Kendall said.

"Really? You think I've got what it takes?" James asked sticking his head out of the bathroom, his toothbrush in hand.

"I do, I think you'll be the greatest model ever and when I'm a big shot music producer I can tell everyone my husband is a model," Kendall said, "I think you'll become like the next Tyra and get your own show about modeling."

"You're so full of it," James chuckled. He gasped and pointed past Kendall.

Kendall looked back to Jake, who was on all fours slowly making him away across the room. Kendall smiled as he watched his son crawl for the first time. Jake was determined. Once he reached his destination, Kendall's lap he fell down. Kendall picked him up and kissed him on the cheek.

"I knew you could do it big guy," Kendall said proudly.

"He's growing so fast," James said smiling. "Pretty soon this little one will be here and it'll go even faster."

"Time is just flying by, huh," Kendall said looking at Jake who was happily blowing spit bubbles. "Can you give kisses?" He asked snaking him lips and blowing Jake a kiss. Jake lightly smacked his lips causing Kendall and James to gasp again.

"Stop it, you're not supposed to grow this fast," James said looking at his son.

"We have to show mom this, she'll freak," Kendall laughed.

-In the Beginning-

Camille sipped her smoothie, as she waited for the guys to show up. She had some big news she wanted to share with them. She was gently rocking Damien in his stroller. He had his bottle and was happy for the moment.

"Camille?"

Camille looked up at Lucy and Jo ran up to her, accompanied by two of the Jennifers. They were all over Damien.

"Aren't you so handsome!" Lucy said smiling at him. Damien grinned in return.

"Oh this can't be Damien, he's too big!" Jo cooed.

"They grow so fast," blonde Jennifer added.

"I know, it's hard to believe he's ten months old already," Camille said with a smile.

"What's with the visit?" Lucy asked casually as she sat down next to the curly haired brunette.

"I wanted to come see some friends and share some big news," Camille replied.

"News? Not knocked up again are you?" curly haired Jennifer jokes.

"Actually, yes I am," Camille replied. The girls all gasped in shock.

"I didn't mean-" curly haired Jennifer started.

"It's ok, I got that from my mom too. She was shocked," Camille replied, "I honestly didn't plan it either."

"Neither did we, but hey it happens."

Camille looked up as Kendall and James approaching the group. James was holding piece of paper. He held it out to Camille.

"It's a boy," Kendall said as the girls all crowded around to see the picture.

"No Jake?" blonde Jennifer asked.

"Nah, my mom wanted to take him for the day," Kendall replied shrugging.

"So when's the due date?" Lucy asked looking up at the pair.

"October tenth," James replied. He looked to Camille.

"March fifteenth," Camille replied with a smile.

"Where is the other Jennifer?" Kendall asked confused.

"She doesn't want to be near us anymore. She thinks we are trying to sabotage her relationship," blonde Jennifer said shaking her head.

"She's pregnant too, and when we weren't happy she flipped out," curly haired Jennifer said.

"Why aren't you happy for her?" Camille asked confused.

"It's not that we are not happy for her. It's just, Carter is a total sleaze. He's gonna dump her and leave her all alone. He's got one kid already that he hardly sees," blonde Jennifer replied.

"Some people can't be reasoned with," Jo shrugged.

The group sat round and talked for a bit longer. Carlos and Logan joined them eventually and congratulated Camille. Soon everyone had other things to do and they were saying their goodbyes.

Camille gather her things while Jo held Damien for her. The others had all left. She turned to face the blonde.

"You're a natural," Camille said.

"Stop it," Jo said looking away from her and Damien.

"You still have time to change your mind. Why didn't you tell him?" Camille asked.

"Because he's happy. I don't want to mess that up for him," Jo said, " and no I don't have time to change my mind. It's been almost a year. I won't change my mind. He doesn't even need to know. I'm taking this to the grave and so are you."

"But Jo-" Camille started.

"Don't forget, I know you're little secret too," Jo said quickly.

"Alright, sorry," Camille said putting her hands up. Damien lifted his hands just like Camille. She smiled at him earning a grin in response.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall and James were making their way back to the apartment, with Carlos and Logan behind them. They were heading home after spending the afternoon with friends.

"How long has Jo been back?" James asked curiously.

"Dunno, a week or two I guess," Kendall replied shrugging. "I think she wrapped filming her latest movie not too long ago."

"She looks like we let herself go a bit," James replied. He didn't notice as Kendall stopped walking.

"Dude, you're jealousy is showing," Carlos said.

James froze and turned to look at his friends shocked. "I-I didn't mean it like that." He said quickly.

"Then how did you mean it?" Kendall asked.

James floundered before closing his mouth. He shook his head. "I am not falling for that. I just...nevermind. Forget I even said anything." He turned and started down the hallway. He heard the others follow him.

The four entered the apartment silently. Logan and Carlos were watching Kendall waiting for him to say something.

"James you know you have nothing to worry about right?" Kendall asked joining the fuming brunette on the couch.

"Did you see the way she was looking at you. She's not over it yet Kendall," James said as Carlos and Logan took off to their bedroom.

"Well she better get there soon, because I am over it. I am completely, one hundred percent in love with you," Kendall said smiling.

"Really?" James asked.

"Really, really," Kendall replied. He moved closer and pulled James into his arms.

The pair sat there for a moment. James was content just having Kendall hold him and assure him that he loved him. He didn't know why, but seeing Jo just made him insecure. Kendall and Jo had been so intense and everyone had thought they would get married and have babies of their own, until they didn't. Kendall has broken up with Jo, because he was in love with someone else, James. It had taken a few weeks for the two to dance around their feelings, but everything worked out in the end.

"I just had a crazy thought," Kendall said bringing James back to reality. James hummed to show that he was listening to him. "Why don't we get married?"

"Is that you're way of proposing to me?" James asked sitting up.

"I-I think so," Kendall stammered. "I mean why not. I love you, you love me. It's gonna happen eventually."

"You're such a romantic," James sighed. Kendall laughed and slipped off the couch and onto one knee.

"James Diamond, will you do me the honor of becoming my husband?" Kendall asked taking James' hand in his.

"Of course," James said smiling as tears sprung to his eyes. "These damn hormones make me so emotional," he said moving to wipe his tears.

Kendall quickly returned to his spot on the couch. He wiped James tears. He leaned in and kissed him gently.

"It's ok, they're happy tears Jamie," Kendall replied.

"Of course they are, but still," James started. Kendall silenced him with a kiss.

"It's ok, but now we have to go ring shopping. I want the world to know that James Diamond is mine," Kendall said.

"Don't you mean James Knight," James replied with a sly smile.

"I like the sound of that."

"Me too."

-In the Beginning-

Camille buzzed about her apartment. It was Damien's first birthday, and she was getting ready for his party. She had the guys coming over, as well as a few other parents she had met in her mommy groups. Her parents were coming too, along with Steve's parents. She had so much to do, and so little time.

A knock at the door made her jump. She looked over at Damien who was laying on his tummy on his blanket. She answered the door and the guys entered her apartment with smiles. Kendall quickly set Jake down beside Damien to let them play.

"Guys the party isn't until later," Camille said surprised to see them.

"Yeah, we thought you might like some help," James said.

"We are here to offer our services," Carlos added.

"How thoughtful," Camille said, "Steve called didn't he?"

"Yeah, he said you were freaking out," Logan chuckled.

"So we're here to help, except for James, he can keep an eye on the kids," Kendall said quickly.

"I'm pregnant Kendall, not in an invalid," James said glaring at his fiance.

"I know, you're eight months pregnant, so no heavy lifting," Kendall said. James just rolled his eyes.

The guys set about helping Camille as she got ready for the party. Eventually Camille wound up in the kitchen with Logan.

"So Mille, are you excited for baby number two," Logan asked.

"Oh yes, I'm hoping I'll get my Sophia this time," Camille replied with a smile.

"Hopefully," Logan said glancing over at the two babies with James. Carlos had joined him and they were playing with the boys.

"You ok?" Camille asked.

"How did you know you were ready for another?" Logan asked quietly.

Camille looked at him confused, before it clicked in her mind. She looked to Carlos and watched him play with Jake.

"Carlos wants one doesn't he," she asked softly.

"Yeah, but I'm scared," Logan admitted, "I mean with Damien there for a minute...I didn't know if I could handle that. I just...I'm not ready."

"I wasn't ready for Damien, but until you hold them in your arms...it's magical," Camille sighed. She placed a hand on her still relatively flat stomach. She smiled. "I love being a mom. I wasn't ready, but I'm learning as I go. I don't think anybody is ever really ready."

"I know...I just...I'm really not ready," Lohan sighed.

"Then wait, talk to him and tell him how you feel. I'm sure he'll understand," Camille said.

"He does, but I think he's disappointed," Logan said casting a glance to the Latino again. He was happily babbling with the two babies.

"It'll happen when it's meant to be. Trust me, it'll be magical," Camille sighed happily. "I didn't know I could love someone so much." She glanced over at Damien with a smile gracing her lips.

Damien had become her whole world. She would do anything for him. Over the last year, her priorities had shifted. She had put her career on hold, much to her manager's dismay. She put Damien first before herself and even before Steve. She was a mom now.

"Yeah, I guess it's different when it's your own," Logan said bringing her from her thoughts.

"Yeah," Camille agreed. She felt a sharp pain in her side. She gasped and her hand flew to her side. As soon as it had happened it was gone.

"You ok?" Logan asked.

"Yeah, just some cramps," Camille said waving her hand. It had been the same way when she was pregnant with Damien. She wasn't worried.

"Are you sure?" Logan asked worriedly.

"Yeah, they come and go. It's normal," Camille said waving him off with a smile. She didn't want anything to stop this party. She could put up with some cramps.

Eventually everything was in place. The guys were lounging about with the boys. Other guests started showing up. Camille's parents stole Damien away from the guys the minute they showed up. Steve arrived shortly after that and had to all but pry his son away from Sophie, to let his parents see him.

The party was in full swing. People were chatting and playing with the kids. Camille was happy that everything has turned out. Steve walked up to her.

"See Mille, everything turned out," Steve said smiling at her.

"I know, I just wanted this to be perfect," Camille said.

"It is, now relax. Damien's only one and and won't even remember this," Steve chuckled.

"I know, but we will," Camille said turning to face Steve. "This is the first of many birthdays he will have, and I want them all to be perfect. I want him, and this little one to have the world," Camille said placing a hand on her stomach. Steve smiled and leaned in and pecked her on the lips.

"We will do our best Mille," Steve promised her.

Camille felt a sharp pain in her stomach. She bit her lips as she fought back a cry at the pain. Steve seemed to notice something was up. He arched a brow at her confused.

"It's nothing," Camille said, "just cramps."

"Are you sure?" Steve asked concerned.

Camille opened her mouth to reply, but the pain came again. She shook her head. Something wasn't right. This wasn't the same as before.

-In the Beginning-

Kendall watched as Jake stuffed his face with cake. James was sitting with Jake making sure he didn't make too much a mess. Jake was now a year old, the time just flew by. Kendall wasn't sure where it had all gone. James was now almost nine months pregnant with their second child too. They were preparing for that as well.

"He looks like he's having fun."

Kendall turned to face Logan with a smile. "Oh yeah, the kid loves cake and is gonna be up all night now."

"It's his first birthday Kendall, let him have fun," Logan laughed. "I know, it just flew by. It's hard to believe he's one already."

"Feels like just yesterday we were in the hospital waiting," Logan added.

"I'm surprised Camille is here," Kendall said lowly as he looked over to her and Steve, who were sitting together watched Damien.

"I think Steve forced her out. She hasn't been the same lately," Logan said.

"Can you blame her?"

"No."

Camille had changed ever since she had discovered her pregnancy wasn't viable. It has been an ectopic pregnancy. She had been rushed the the hospital after Damien's first birthday party. The doctors had to terminate and her chances of getting pregnant again had been drastically lowered. Steve had just been glad that Camille was ok. She took it hard though.

"She'll bounce back," Logan said quickly. "She's gotta grieve and it'll take time."

"I know," Kendall replied. He still didn't like seeing their friend like that.

"Kendall, look," James called to him. Kendall looked over and saw James with Jake standing before him. Jake was standing all on his own. Jake took a few wobbly steps before he fell.

"Oh he's so precious," Brooke cooed at her grandson. She scooped him up in her arms.

Kendall smiled at that. Jake had been slowly getting braver and braver. He was doing more on his own. He was always pulling himself up and trying to walk. He would manage a few steps before he fell. It was progress.

-In the Beginning-

James looked down at the baby in his arms. After twelve hours of hard labor, Adam Spencer Knight was born. He was finally here, and in James' arms. It was as surreal as the day he had first held Jake.

"Baba!"

James looked over as Kendall brought Jake into the room. It was time for Jake to meet his baby brother.

"Hi Jake," James greeted his oldest son. Kendall brought Jake over to his side. "This is your baby brother, Adam."

"Bruba?" Jake asked looking to James's tummy confused.

"Yep, brother is here now with us," James said smiling. Jake leaned over and looked at Adam thoughtfully.

"Are you ready to do this all over again?" Kendall asked James.

"With you by my side I'm ready for anything," James replied with a smile.

"Bruba A-Am," Jake declared finally.

"Yep, that's Adam," Kendall chuckled holding Jake close.

 **So there you go, year two of Kendall and James' lives together. Lots happened! Jake is one! Will be and Adam get along? Will Camille recover from her loss? Kames wedding! So much going on and we all know the end goal, but how did everyone get there? Guess you'll have to wait to find out. Next chapter will be toddler Jake and baby Adam! Also some toddler Damien. As always there is more to come and I love you guys.**

 **Always**

 **OUTOFMYMIND**


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